Extensive compressor reviews and FAQ

This site is basically on hiatus for the foreseeable future. That is, I may still do an occasional review, but please don't expect much. I just don't have the time or money to keep doing this anymore. It cost me thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours every year. After twelve years of this obsession, I have to move on and put my time and money toward my family, home, and different creative projects.
Additionally, most compressor pedals coming out these days are just terribly boring. I don't know why most brands even bother--they just re-hash the same old ideas, aiming for the exact middle of the road: not good enough, complex enough, or unusual enough to cost much money or effort in design or manufacturing. Most of the pedals out there are "pretty good sounding" but totally unremarkable. When I run across a really bad pedal, like the new EHX Platform, I just don't have the will anymore to write the negative review it deserves, or to defend that negative review from brand fanboys. There are probably some unique and special new pedals out there, but I just cannot keep buying the boring mediocre ones in a long march to find the occasional treasure. A maker just recently sent me their pedal to review, and it was a perfect example of a "pretty good sounding" but tedious retread that honestly just made me want to beat my head against the wall.
If a brand really thinks they have done something special, that stands apart from the other dreck on the market, I invite them to please contact me so I can "come out of retirement" for them. I will happily do that. They will need to send me their pedal as a loaner; I will not buy any more pedals, and I will not beg manufacturers for favors. If you as a player want to see a pedal reviewed, I ask you to please reach out to the manufacturer directly and ask them to contact me and send me their pedal. Again though, please limit that to pedals that might offer some quality that other pedals don't already provide.
I am going to keep producing and selling the OVNIFX Smoothie, because people like it a lot. The fact that I sell a compressor of my own has made many people justly suspicious of my bias when writing reviews of other brands. All I can say is I have done my best to stay as impartial as is humanly possible, and to describe things exactly as I hear them, using spectrum analyzer and oscilloscope testing to verify my subjective impressions. As brands like FEA, Origin, Diamond, and RMI can attest, when I love something special and excellent about a pedal I am happy to promote and praise it over my own goods.
Lastly, many kind readers have written in to tell me about technical errors in my reviews. If I have not corrected those errors, it was only because of procrastination, not rejection of their advice (usually). I do intend to make those corrections at some time. Please feel free to remind me, if you told me about something like that a long time ago and I never followed up on it. I've probably forgotten it by now.
Thanks so much to everyone who has joined me on this journey over the last twelve years!
-Cyrus Heiduska
April 25, 2018

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